(One of the funnier notes. A couple of my female friends disagreed with a few of these. I have no idea why.)
I've been known to subscribe to - and quote - Murphy's Laws fairly often. That said, I decided to come up with a few of my own regarding my favorite social environment (I can't speak on drinking experiences, so anyone with expertise in that area can feel free to offer laws related to drinking below). Also, feel free to add other laws as you see fit.
1. If you see a really pretty girl, she's taken.
Corollary: if she's not taken, she's nontraditional.
Corollary: if she's not nontraditional, you already know her.
Corollary: if you don't already know her, the lights have come on and she's not that pretty.
2. If you rely on you to get a girl's attention, you'll get what you deserve. If you rely on anything else to get a girl's attention, you'll deserve what you get.
3. As soon as the song you've waited to hear all night comes on, someone of the same sex (or opposite, if you are nontraditional) will stand less than a foot in front of you.
Corollary: people will always stand closer to you during songs that have dances requiring movement.
Corollary: when line dancing, the only person who does not know the line dance will be the person right in front of you.
4. When you try to dance with a girl and her friend gives her the 'no' sign, pay attention. If she stops dancing with you, it's because the friend wants you. If she dances with you anyway, it's because she wants you.
5. Any night in which someone other than you says your whole name is a bad night.
6. The night you spend an hour figuring out what to wear will be the night someone spills a drink on you.
Corollary: someone will spill a drink on you the day that you buy a new outfit for the club.
Corollary: someone will step on your shoes at the club if you wear them the same day you buy them.
7. The club that says that everyone gets in free before 12 will not let anyone in after 11:30.
8. The larger the number of people/groups involved on the business end, the longer the line will be.
9. There is some evil Kryptonite-type substance that turns many pretty girls into guys once they step through the doors.
10. If you park anywhere close to the club and you want to leave when it closes, someone who did not even come to the club will block you in.
11. If the best-looking girls in the club are working, you're probably not going to have the best evening.
12. If you walk into the club with expectations, you will often walk out with disappointment.
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