(I also employed a quick-hitting one-line style in many of my notes. These were 100 of the best. Yes, I know I could have just posted this one as a reflection. Oh well.)
As most of you all know, I’ve been doing these things for a couple years now. Covered just about everything under the sun except football. Well, this is a snapshot of whatever has come to mind since I did the first one of these (well, those with the quick comments). Sans that ‘ado’ stuff people always talk about when they’re introducing things…
I actually heard Barack Obama referred to as a blabbering idiot last night. Um, after the last 8 years shouldn’t we all know what a blabbering idiot is? (Vol. 4, 03/25/09)
So Plies hates skinny/tight jeans. That I completely understand. However, someone may want to inform him how the "pants hang low" thing got started. (Vol. 5, 04/04/09)
Apparently paying to get into the club with a credit card is the new thing for 2009. I have problems with that, as mentioned previously. (Vol. 5, 04/04/09)
It's 2009, so the word game must be stepped up. Instead of "pretty" or "ugly", it's "aesthetically talented" or "aesthetically challenged/deficient". More to come later. (Vol. 5, 04/04/09)
Folks kill me talking about I'm better in some area or another than I was previously: it's not that I've improved, it's that people get more in tune with how good I've always been. (Vol. 5, 04/04/09)
It is 2009: acronyms are not cute or cool or chic or whatever. They are extremely corny - unless, of course, they involve naming a series of notes after oneself. That's just tight. (Vol. 6, 04/08/09)
"I let my tape rock til my tape pop"...okay, how about that really happened. I was listening to a tape at work and pop it went. Who knew? (Vol. 6, 04/08/09)
If you see a really pretty girl, she's taken. Corollary: if she's not taken, she's nontraditional. Corollary: if she's not nontraditional, you already know her. Corollary: if you don't already know her, the lights have come on and she's not that pretty. (Vol. 7, 04/09/09)
Sometimes it's better to be the person that people should pay attention to than it is to be the person that people do pay attention to. (Vol. 9, 04/17/09)
There was a great "Zing!" in today's Democrat: someone commented on the Tea Party held downtown..."Tea bag protesters ride on tax-paid streets to park at a tax-paid plaza, ride a tax-paid inspected elevator, cross a tax-paid crosswalk to a tax-paid government building, arguably all here because tax-paid soldiers keep us safe from evil, and they want their paycheck back?". (Vol. 9, 04/17/09)
Why is it that people say they're letting you go when they're the ones that really have to go? (Vol. 10, 04/22/09)
"When my time on Earth has gone and my activities here are passed, I want they bury me upside down so my critics can kiss my"...I think y'all know where that's going. Shout out to Bob Knight for that one. (Vol. 10, 04/22/09)
When it rains, it pours - and when it's dry, it's really dry. I need fate and moderation to meet one day. (Vol. 11, 04/24/09)
How the [heck] are you going to give out a study guide for a 75-question exam when only 5 of the questions are on the study guide? (Vol. 11, 04/24/09)
I think the words 'bromance' and 'man-crush' should be stricken from the English language. If you're a guy and you like another guy, be straight out with it. All this halfway stuff and trying to make it more socially acceptable is not cool. (Vol. 11, 04/24/09)
One shining example of the double standards that many women love to employ: During Spider-Man 3 Mary Jane got mad when Peter and Gwen Stacy performed "the kiss" at the celebration. Funny thing is she never mentioned that she performed the kiss with someone else (John Jameson, toward the end of Spider-Man 2). And to cut folk off at the pass: the fact that they weren't a couple at the time of her kiss is irrelevant because the fact that they were together during his kiss never came up anywhere in her argument. (Vol. 11, 04/24/09)
There are two types of leaders: those who make themselves feel important and those who make others feel important. (Vol. 12, 04/27/09)
I've noticed that I've gotten a lot more selective with how I use my time lately and am now quite focused on using it efficiently. Whereas I used to just do stuff, I now find myself doing a cost/benefit analysis of almost any activity - especially those that involve leaving the house. (Vol. 14, 05/02/09)
Money spent on lottery tickets should be tax-deductible since it goes to the state. (Vol. 15, 05/09/09)
I may have asked this before, but why is it that so many females are in love with Tweety and some have Tweety tattoos and whatnot? They do know Tweety is male, right (as evidenced by the presence of a pink female Tweety)? (Vol. 16, 05/12/09)
Fort Lauderdale city officials want to build a water park: those of us over the age of 25 know that we already had one. Also, this comes as local government is thinking of raising water bills between 29 and 40 percent. (Vol. 18, 05/19/09)
My kingdom for the ability to sleep for seven straight hours. (Vol. 19, 05/21/09)
Lately I've been hearing people talk about "the other guy" a whole lot. Whether it's Team 3D talking about WWE, MSNBC and Fox News trading barbs (although MSNBC does it in a more comical fashion), or Yahoo people talking about ESPN online, folk seem to worry about the competition too much. It'd be nice if people just focused on themselves. (Vol. 20, 06/08/09)
Pretty girls are a dime a dozen. Sane girls are worth their weight in gold. (Vol. 20, 06/08/09)
And finally, from Mike and Mike this morning: an Egyptian man was living in a subset of society where arranged marriages were still the norm. His parents wanted him to marry a woman from a higher class, but he fell in love with a woman from a poorer family. He tried for two years to get his father to allow him to marry the woman he loved, but his father refused. The man finally took matters into his own hands. I think everyone reading this knows the point of arranged marriages, so I'll skip to the end: to spite his father, he heated up a knife and chopped off, as Golic said, his reproductive organ. I think this should also be Olbermann's WTF Moment on tonight's Countdown. (Vol. 20, 06/08/09)
I really couldn't start with anything else: I saw an ad in the paper Saturday for a breast reduction service...for men. (Vol. 21, 06/11/09)
There was an article in the Sun-Sentinel asking if the FCAT prepares students for the future. If so much money is being spent on it - particularly now, with the state's economy being so bad - and the question is still being asked after being continuously asked ever since its inception a decade ago, I'd say that the test should be shelved either way. (Vol. 21, 06/11/09)
One of the best things about having a blog is having the ability to see past mistakes. One of the worst things about having a blog is realizing that you've made those mistakes before (after the subsequent occurrence, but still) and didn't learn from them. (Vol. 22, 06/15/09)
Fun With Jail Times…Michael Vick: 22 months. Donte Stallworth: 30 days (24, actually). Chris Brown: 0 days. Guy who stole one of Lance Armstrong’s bikes: 3 years. (Vol. 23, 06/24/09)
I’ve never visited the Baseball Hall of Fame, but if they’re going to segregate the ‘steroid era’ then they need to at least segregate the segregated era. (Vol. 23, 06/24/09)
I seriously think Michael [Jackson] was the first to have haters. People hated on him in ways that rappers can't imagine. (Vol. 24, 06/26/09)
If you want to know how far America has to go and the divisions we still have (white/black, rich/poor, citizen/immigrant), simply compare the Duke lacrosse case to that of Eric Frimpong. (Vol. 25, 07/10/09)
Just once (not going James Ingram here, just saying – wait, I’m making that reference like people know who James Ingram is) I’d like to see people who are going through problems be the ones who comment on them in more than a “man on the street” fashion. The status quo of rich people commenting on the economy or of school board officials commenting on education totally misses the point. To that end, I think that every organization’s board of directors (or corresponding body), no matter what field or discipline, should have at least one actively-practicing member. (Vol. 25, 07/10/09)
It never fails: a man was fatally gored at the Running of the Bulls. Why? Why do people do that if they can’t avoid the bulls? (Vol. 25, 07/10/09)
Life is not meant to be observed, it is meant to be experienced. That’s why we don’t live in labs. (Vol. 26, 07/13/09)
From the “Please: No” files…Jackie Chan and Jaden Smith are working on a Karate Kid remake – by the way, that screaming you hear is the 80s being swagger-jacked yet again. (Vol. 26, 07/13/09)
My parents are planning my dad’s retirement party toward the end of the 2009-10 school year. My only request was that no one I’ve dated be on the guest list. Of course, their reply was verbal hope that I would be dating someone else by then. Le sigh. (Vol. 26, 07/13/09)
Dear Jeff Sessions: having opinion that is “out of the mainstream” is not a bad thing. A quick glance of your history book will remind you that almost all progress – including the founding of this nation – came from opinion/sentiment that was “out of the mainstream”. PS: I wanted to stay away from the SC stuff, but couldn’t resist. – Benny (Vol. 26, 07/13/09)
I have figured out how to market myself to women: I have to accentuate the fact that settling with (or for, depending on whom you ask) me is a guarantee to not have obese children. (Vol. 28, 07/30/09)
I wonder how much better the world would be if both men and women were straight-up about what they wanted from each other in the beginning. (Vol. 28, 07/30/09)
Cops Gone Wild, Part II: some of Mobile's finest arrested a man for apparently taking too long in the bathroom. The man, who was deaf and disabled (he was in the bathroom due to an upset stomach), was forcibly removed from the bathroom and charged with the usual (resisting, disorderly conduct, failure to obey). Thankfully, the magistrate refused to accept the charges and the cops had to take him home. (Vol. 28, 07/30/09)
Sometime around 1999 or 2000, arrogance and hypocrisy got married. They had a child called sanctimony, and that child has been allowed to run amok through various sections of society. Problem child. (Vol. 28, 07/30/09)
I've intentionally avoided the Gates/Crowley thing in notes for a reason, but I'll say this on the subject of race in general: people who don't want to talk about it likely prefer to stay silent because they're scared of what they're going to say. (Vol. 28, 07/30/09)
Rupert Murdoch announced that the FOX News website will start charging users for content, saying that “quality journalism is not cheap”. Insert your own joke here. (Vol. 29, 08/06/09)
Several candy manufacturers are complaining about the price of US sugar and want to buy cheaper foreign sugar. Farmers want to charge so much when they already get subsidies. People are fine with those subsidies, though – even though it’s welfare in a different suit. (Vol. 31, 08/14/09)
Sometimes the greatest tricks played on us are those we play on ourselves. (Vol. 33, 08/28/09)
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference"...there: just felt like I needed to say that. (Vol. 34, 09/03/09)
When people use multiple adjectives to describe something or someone, I wonder if the adjectives are placed in any particular order. If there’s a big red rock somewhere, is it more important that the rock is big than that it is red? Does the rock’s being big serve as a better identifier than its being red? People say more than they mean to say with adjective use. (Vol. 36, 09/24/09)
Dell is coming out with a laptop that charges wirelessly. Obviously this is great - and expensive - but I'm simultaneously thinking "what has to be in the air for energy and radioactive signals and all that for this to be possible". (Vol. 37, 10/01/09)
I swear, Mo'Nique is the face of BET. Think about that as you go to sleep tonight. (Vol. 38, 10/07/09)
A bunch of conservatives are upset: so what else is new...but this one's good. They're claiming that modern translations of the Bible are too liberal. As if there needed to be any further proof...God is a Democrat. (Vol. 38, 10/07/09)
Eddie Griffin had one of the best quotes I've heard in a long time: "don't be a product of your environment, be a product of your imagination". Most commonly it's probably used in the sense of a geographical environment, but it can apply to other things as well. (Vol. 39, 10/15/09)
One thing I hate saying to myself is "I could have done better". Even saying I should have done better is different because that can sometimes be attributed to trying to be a perfectionist. Saying I could have, though, is just bad. (Vol. 40, 10/22/09)
The longer we live, the more we (should) notice that we are more alike than we are different. (Vol. 41, 10/27/09)
I've learned a very important lesson recently: I don't have to seek revenge on anyone that I feel has wronged me. God handles stuff like that, sometimes in the most ironic of ways. He allows me to focus on other things, which I obviously appreciate. (Vol. 42, 11/02/09)
People have much more time and ability to measure the moral currency of others when they have none themselves. (Vol. 52, 01/14/10)
Watching too much TV could shorten your life, according to a study...uh oh, I might be in trouble. It supposedly leads to a disruption in metabolism...oh, nevermind. (Vol. 52, 01/14/10)
Whoever said beauty is only skin deep lied. Fine lasts forever. (Vol. 54, 01/20/10)
After all this, I'm just going to say that somebody needs to make some nasty, bitter drink and call it STFU. They could sell it at Spencer's alongside the other drinks with rather suggestive names. If they say something stupid, give that can to them instead of opening another can...because, you know, it's about peace. (Vol. 56, 01/31/10)
Here's my Twitter-style argument for tax hikes on the wealthy...this government and financial system allowed you to get rich: you should owe a bit more than the rest of us. (Vol. 57, 02/02/10)
One of the greatest gifts we can give the world is consistency. Anyone can do anything once. (Vol. 57, 02/02/10)
I have no use for these, so a romantic tip for the Gs: if you are really into your Valentine, don't get her red roses. Petals are fine (I'll let y'all to figure out how to use them), but get an assorted bunch and use the psychology of colors - not sure if that's what it's officially called but folk should know what I mean - to tell an interesting story. (Vol. 57, 02/02/10)
With the talk of labor unrest in the football and basketball worlds, I'm back thinking about this point. Who could ever be on the side of management in a labor dispute (unless labor is just really crazy)? Mad at millionaire players, but cool with billionaire owners. This makes no sense to me. (Vol. 59, 02/19/10)
From the "no, not all black people are alike" section...researchers found that many dyads of southern Africans displayed more genetic variance than that found between Europeans and Asians - even if the southern Africans lived within a few miles of each other. (Vol. 59, 02/19/10)
When I read about Rep. Alan Grayson being caught in a coup in Niger, I wondered how far down I'd have to scroll into the comments section to find the predictable racial epithet joke. First one. Sigh. (Vol. 60, 02/21/10)
I meant to put this in the last one but forgot...this "Daddy's Home" song got me thinking. The 'daddy' thing is not cool. It just doesn't sound right to me. I don't want a girl thinking of me like her father. That's incestuous. To my recollection, I've never been called daddy and I'm glad that's the case. To the homies: if she calls you daddy, run for the hills. You'll thank me later. (Vol. 61, 02/23/10)
Twenty-nine dimensions, huh...you know, that means there's a one in a 500 million (estimated) chance that you actually find the right person for me. You know, come to think of it, I've always said that there about 10 perfect people for any one person in the world - mainly because there are too many people for there to be only one perfect match. Six billion people minus about a billion (guessing) children leaves five billion. Five billion divided by 500 million equals...10. Thank you very much. (Vol. 61, 02/23/10)
When no one is around you and you're out of the limelight, you find out which people are truly friends to you. When everyone is around and you're in the limelight, you find out whether you are a friend to yourself. (Vol. 63, 03/10/10)
After seeing that local elections were held Tuesday and that some parts of Broward had pitiful turnout figures (the aggregate turnout among the cities was 9 percent), I have one wish concerning social science - social studies if you're old school - education with regard to government: that students are taught the meaning of the phrase "all politics is local". Along those lines, I'll say this: there's a reason that social science/studies is not an accountable area on the FCAT. Who wants a well-informed electorate? (Vol. 63, 03/10/10)
This has come up at various times across different circles, so I'll take this time to address it...this idea of political correctness in terms of everyone getting participation awards or whatever. Let me explain something: there is a reason they keep score. There's a reason there are winners and losers. There's a reason for there being smart and stupid...well, things (it's really hard to blanket call a person either/or). There is a line drawn not only for purposes of comparison, but also for the sake of truth. If I have a child in a dance class and they perform like Marlon Jackson (if you've seen The Jacksons: An American Dream, you get this) then they don't need to hear "yay, you did it". As one of my friends said, when you lie to folks and artificially boost their egos you only set them up for greater falls. (Vol. 63, 03/10/10)
I've got a question for any (or all) of those women out there who fawned over D'Angelo 10 years ago...for those of you who have seen his recent mugshot, how does it feel? (Vol. 63, 03/10/10)
Smart people live to think. Really smart people think to live. (Vol. 63, 03/10/10)
Dutch nurses are saying that, um, special services have been requested by patients and are upset that the patients say such services should be standard. See, conservatives, this is why we say Rush Limbaugh is an idiot: he wants to go to Costa Rica. (Vol. 64, 03/12/10)
Whenever I think our country has made some type of social progress I see things such as the Mississippi prom controversy, a poll that says only 69 percent of Americans approve of gay people serving in the military (if anyone has a sound argument that is in the minority, I'd love to hear it: no jokes or argument, I just want to understand why sexual orientation matters), and uproar over a female football coach. (Vol. 64, 03/12/10)
According to a CNN.com article, 1/4 of people who got married last year met online. It also says that people should be more forthcoming in their searches for love and treat such searches like job searches. (Vol. 65, 03/15/10)
That Stuart Scott interview [of Michael Jordan] was the journalistic definition of softcore. Somewhere Ahmad Rashad is crying. (Vol. 66, 03/22/10)
So of course I'm getting the "you should get out and date" thing from everywhere. When someone I want to date tells me I should date, I'll listen. (Vol. 66, 03/22/10)
I wonder when the last time was that a congressional member from either party read the Constitution in its entirety. #shouldbeajobrequirement (Vol. 67, 03/25/10)
CNN has a question up asking whether "you" have anything on your FB page that you wouldn't want your employer to see. If I have a boss that's racist, a Republican, a Brett Favre fan (I wonder how many people fit all three of those), doesn't have a sense of humor, is an idiot, or plain doesn't know me then I'd be in trouble. Otherwise I'm straight. (Vol. 68, 03/30/10)
Flesh-N-Bone was arrested for allegedly hitting his mother with a gun. His mother. Pitiful is far too good a word to describe that. If anyone ever hit my mother with a gun they best have a bullet for me - and think it's just talk if you want to. (Vol. 68, 03/30/10)
Richelle Carey looked so good on Tuesday that it took me four minutes to get my breath back. Literally. (Vol. 69, 03/31/10)
Okay, I'm going in...if I am not within arm's length of you and I sense a smell that can't be bought in a store, something is wrong - and it likely cannot be made right. Ever. (Vol. 69, 03/31/10)
You can buy tickets for the club at a vending machine inside Publix...only in South Florida. (Vol. 74, 04/28/10)
If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, then it's yours. If you miss it, go after it. If you don't miss it and it never comes back, you didn't have any business loving it in the first place. (Vol. 75, 05/02/10)
Question everyone should ask themselves before placing a phone call during certain hours: "why am I calling". Seriously, if you place a call during third shift it best fit into one of three categories outside of an emergency: the show, the after-party, or the hotel (hopefully someone out there will catch that reference). Actually, my classmates are exempt from this...but they know me better than to think I'm in any kind of schoolwork mode at that time anyway. (Vol. 76, 05/04/10)
I am openly embarrassed by the fact that Luda's song "My Chick Bad" has made me think about getting back in the game. (Vol. 84, 05/28/10)
I know this will be somewhat blasphemous to say, but of course I'm going to say it anyway: the Constitution provided a framework for how this country was supposed to be run, but as far as a literal document it's not worth the 223-year-old paper it was printed on. (Vol. 85, 05/29/10)
If Tiny and Toya can convince their men to do an album together, that would be the best thing that could possibly come out of their own business arrangement. (Vol. 85, 05/29/10)
Somehow, President Obama has gotten both Clintons to work for him - and only one of them is on an official payroll. I think some of this development is happenstance, but still...the man is a genius even if he just allowed it to happen. If it was all part of a master plan? Then it only serves as more support for [ESPN baseball columnist] Keith Law's assessment - which I agree with - that 125 is a bit low as a guess on the President's IQ. (Vol. 85, 05/29/10)
A Findlaw.com survey of 1,000 "demographically balanced" (their term) people found that 2/3 of respondents couldn't name one - one - Supreme Court justice. In case anyone's wondering, I got 7 (missed Breyer and Kennedy). This is why I favor literacy tests: not the kind that kept us from voting...shoot, I think those kinds of literacy tests would now work in our favor. May be a repeat thought, but oh well. (Vol. 86, 06/02/10)
Between his sentiment toward BP and furor over the army general's aides talking about Joe Biden, the president is becoming more angry. I think I've said this before, but that's a good thing. You have to have a little bit of that mean streak to be an effective leader: being a robot and saying we can all get along does not work 100% of the time. (Vol. 88, 06/22/10)
It's funny how conservatives love to say they were the party of Lincoln and whatever else to try to endear themselves to black folks...but they forget important details like the fact that the Republican party was a lot less conservative at the top at that time. Barry Goldwater started the conservative revolution in the party, which somehow coincided with all kinds of not-so-pro-black actions coming from the party - including a 1964 - as in "same year as Goldwater" - Strom Thurmond switch from the Democrats to the Republicans. Hmm. Synopsis: the parties switched, the ideologies stayed the same. I swear it had to have been a liberal who put the part about 'the whole truth' into the oath that legal witnesses take. (Vol. 90, 07/02/10)
Some media outlets feel it's newsworthy that Cambridge took a year to produce a report that said Dr. Gates and Sgt. Crowley were both at fault last year. Then again, maybe it is newsworthy...because I only think they're half-right. (Vol. 90, 07/02/10)
I read an article on Sahel Kazemi (the girl who is widely believed to have killed Steve McNair) and started to feel bad for her. Here's the problem, though: (at least part of) it's because she was attractive. We as a society are a lot more forgiving - and allowing and accepting - of aesthetically talented people than we are those who are aesthetically challenged. (Vol. 91, 07/06/10)
It's amazing how our bodies tell us to live free. Think about it: whenever we feel good there's a release of some sort, and whenever we feel bad there's some sort of pressure. Sometimes we let our psychological act in a way that is out of balance with our physical, and that can be when we get into trouble. (Vol. 91, 07/06/10)
I've said it in talking to folk about this and I'll say it again: Chris Bosh pimped us all. He's easily the #3 option of the bunch, but let's look at the timeline. First he basically says he's LeBron's lapdog (apologies to Stan Van Gundy). He retracts that comment amidst the firestorm, then he says it again. He questions Riley's ability to get all three of them to Miami. He gets LeBron to leave Cleveland by not going there. He gets Wade to stay in Miami by agreeing to go there. Through this confluence of actions, LeBron goes to Miami. Bosh ends up with the maximum amount of money possible (max contract plus the absence of state tax in Florida) and two star teammates to take the blame when the team doesn't win. Didn't he look like someone whose plan came together perfectly on Friday? Chris Bosh is the Verbal Kint of the NBA. (Vol. 92, 07/19/10)
I've noticed that in all facets of life bad things tend to find you, while good things you have to find and/or look for. If bad things find you, then you will certainly find them when you look for them. If you look for the good in life, you may not always find it...but then again, you may always find it if you have the right perspective. Mind over matter. (Vol. 94, 09/14/10)
I just think there’s some irony in the fact that the conservatives often want to take us back in time. They want to go back to 1994 with the Contract with America remix. I’m sure they’d love to go back to 1984, when Reagan won that landslide. How about 1974 so they can change events at a particular hotel? Maybe 1964 so they could have kept a certain piece of legislation from passing? 1954…they could have tried to keep the Supreme Court from a particular ruling. (Vol. 97, 09/23/10)
There’s value in verbiage. Look at the words: conservative, liberal, progressive, regressive, left-wing, right-wing, neocon…ever heard of a neolib? Didn’t think so. (Vol. 97, 09/23/10)
I hate to admit that I’ve forgotten the Spanish translation for karma. Maybe Alberto Contador can remind me what it is. (Vol. 98, 09/30/10)
When you make your decisions on whom to vote for, do us all a favor and ask yourselves why you’re making particular choices: not general reasons, but rational that speaks to specific measures or actions that you agree with. Heard a great exchange on Bloomberg concerning the fact that a lot of people who don’t do that. (Vol. 99, 10/12/10)
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