I said on a blog once that all women are either two points above or two points below what they would rate themselves (on a scale of 1-10). Not "within two points of what they would rate themselves", either exactly two points above or exactly two points below. This note will have four sections.
A. Methodology
As I explained when asked about it, I use a 10-point scale differently than most people. I split my 10-point scale into two scales of 1-5. One scale covers looks, the other covers personality. The two are mutually exhaustive.
As everyone knows, there are three possible ways one can rate themselves two points above or below a particular point: one above or below in each category, two points above or below in one, and two points above or below in the other. You know, this may create a whole other note (ed. note: it will). I'll finish this one first.
B. Overraters
Let's start with above (to get it out of the way)...sometimes women think too much of themselves. Shock, I know. Some women who overrate will overrate their looks, but most of the time women who overrate will overrate their personalities. They will swear they're the 'cool chick' who's different...but they're not. There was actually a VSB post about this last week. Thursday, IIRC.
It's not just about that, however. Some women will claim to be downright virtuous when we know the opposite is true. No, I don't mean virtuous in the religious sense: this is much more secular than that. Por ejemplo, how are you going to sit up here and say that you always tell the truth when I know you lied to me two days ago? Same with hiding stuff. Men know a lot more of the dirt that women do than men let on: men just have a reason that we don't let women know that this is the case. And notice: I didn't say we know it all...for more than one reason. Same time, trust and believe that we know more than we tell. Much of the time, overraters lie to everyone else because they lie to themselves first. They want to believe that they're better people than they really are, so they tell themselves that they are and selectively forget certain truths. Understandable? Yes. Right? No.
Overraters in the looks department are far less controversial. A woman's dress is Smurf blue. Great. If her hair is the same color, that's not so great. Most of the time overraters in the looks department fall into that subcategory because of some ghetto (calling it what it is) fashion trend. Hair really shouldn't be more than three colors. Knockoffs are not the business. The only packaging that should have 'juicy' on it should be made by Tropicana. If one thinks of every fashion faux pas and creates a list (ahem, lace front wigs, ahem), the women who are guilty of those will pretty much cover the 'looks overraters' list. Well, there are also women who simply don't have the aesthetic talent that they say they have. Now, I'm not going to bag on people and list the reasons and all. That's 1) not the point of this, and 2) just not fair. They're out there, though - I will say that much.
C. Underraters
I just want to shake my head (and I did when I started typing this sentence) at this group of women. I'll say this straight up: if you're reading this, you are most likely an underrater. I don't think I've spared any words in extolling the virtues of my female friends. That said, this is one virtue that they don't have - and that I'm going to talk about.
Whereas most overraters do so with their personalities, most underraters do so with their looks. They know their personalities are straight...okay, way beyond straight. I have some of the best female friends known to man, and one testament to their greatness - in terms of personality, at least - is evidenced by the fact that some of them are cool with each other. People who were acquainted with each other through me now vibe with each other when I'm nowhere around. That's just because I know attractive people. And guess what? Even in a platonic sense, attractive people attract people.
Sigh: attractive people...I know quite a few of them. If you don't believe me, I cordially invite you to cycle through my friends list. No, I will not embarrass anyone and start saying names (but you'll know when you get there). Most of them will say they're alright. I will then give side-eyes that could cut holes through diamonds. Seriously: sometimes I look through my news feed and forget to read. In full disclosure, this happens more with some than it does with others. Some of them deserve compliments until whoever says them runs out of breath.
More disclosure: if I've ever asked you whether you know how pretty you are, it wasn't a line or me being flirtatious or anything like that. As those who know me will attest, there are only two reasons I ask questions: either 1) I don't know the answer, or 2) you don't know the answer. Obviously, the referenced question fits the latter. Sometimes I swear some women really don't really know the full extent of their aesthetic beauty. There's a reason you have stalkers. There's a reason men say the dumbest things to you. Shoot, there's a reason that men call you pretty over and over again.
You are.
On to those who underrate their personalities: this isn't so much that they underrate their own. It's more that they overrate those of other women, which causes them to underrate their own in comparison. Let me get this one out of the way, since I've said it before: no, all of your girls are not as tight as you. It's a lot closer to 'none' than you care to admit, or maybe even know (women don't share all their dirt with their girls either - it's not just men who get shut out). "I'm not all that special"...yes, you are. "There are a lot of girls out there like me"...no, there aren't. I know this seems to run counter to something I said above, but the difference lies in the comparison group. Women compare themselves to women like themselves. Men compare women to other women.
D. The Hidden Truth
This will probably be the part that catches the most heat. Good thing I'm from South Florida.
Two points above, two points below...of course, this means that no woman rates herself correctly. The last point in Part III has a lot to do with it: selection error with regard to the comparison group. Sometimes it also has to do with something - or, more accurately, someone - that should have no bearing on the matter. I don't know who that person is, but somewhere along the way someone said something unduly negative - or positive, in the case of overraters - that stuck when it shouldn't have. I have no idea what it is/was. I really don't care to know - and of course the point is that women shouldn't either.
Last but not least, it also has to do with the fact that many women haven't run across the man who appropriately appreciates them. This applies to underraters far more than it does overraters. Men who inspire overraters are often chumps that shouldn't be allowed into the proverbial room. Men who...inspire certainly isn't the right word here...breed underraters are no better. With all the negativity in the world, the fact that fools add to it in a way that cuts to the core is nothing short of terrible.
I'll leave with one of the simplest of statistical concepts: regression to the mean. Underraters often believe themselves to be closer to the mean - or the mode, or even to the left side of the curve - than they are. In many cases, men already know that underraters are on the right side of the curve. The only problem occurs when underraters remind men of their talents. It's understandable: because they underrate themselves, they expect men to underrate them too and want to stop that from happening. On behalf of men, we get it...but as has been stated, we wouldn't be interested in women we underrate. We may not know everything that makes underraters great, but the simple approach states that we have an idea.
On the other hand, overraters often believe themselves to be further away from the mean...and they're right, just not in the direction. Direction matters, though. This is a two-tailed concept. There are women on the left side, there are women on the right side. Overraters seem to think they're on the right side when they're on the left. Of course, they do things that move them further to the left and think they are moving further to the right. Then again, overraters are less likely to understand statistics anyway.
Sad thing, since statistical measures are most often used to...rate things.
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The second part won't come out immediately after this. Might be a couple weeks, as next week is filling up fast. If I find a groove sometime in the next few days, I may try to get to it. Rather not rush, however; so we'll see how it goes. Oh: it will concern the six types of women (types being derived from the second paragraph of section A).
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